Spoil-Free Review: Guardians of the Galaxy

“Well that shit just happened”. Basically those were my thoughts leaving Guardians of Galaxy. I expected greatness when I went to go see Marvel’s newest monster hit, if I hadn’t I wouldn’t have seen it at 9:45 on a Thursday in Imax 3D. But there was no part of me, not even the most optimistic bone in my body—which is coincidentally my femur–that ever expected anything that awesome. My second thought when leaving the theater was, “Oh poor DC Comics.” I mean Marvel is just turning these stupendous movies one after the other and DC has been all but relegated to network TV, and not just network TV but the CW which has never once produced a show that wasn’t bad. I mean what did we expect from the station that used to be The WB—the original home of the modern day minstrel show before Tyler Perry was Tyler…